SEPTEMBER 11th, 2010

WE REGRET TO INFORM THE WINNIPEG SUN

WE DON'T GIVE HALF A SHIT ABOUT BILLY GUNN
[ Citations: 1, 2, 3, 4, but really pretty much just 5 ]

SEPTEMBER 10th, 2010

SELLING ALCOHOL TO UNIVERSITY STUDENTS / REALLY SHOULDN'T BE THIS DIFFICULT
[ Citations: 1, 2 ]

SEPTEMBER 9th, 2010

SURELY THE MAYOR WILL CAVE TO YOUR DEMANDS

IF YOU PRESENT THEM AS MUSICAL THEATRE
[ Citation. ]

SEPTEMBER 8th, 2010

MORE POLICE ON THE STREETS / THIS IDEA TOOK SIX YEARS
[ Citations: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8 ]

SEPTEMBER 7th, 2010

NO / I WASN'T TRYING TO KILL YOU
[ Citation. ]

SEPTEMBER 6th, 2010

THAT BODY IN THE RED RIVER ISN'T FOUL PLAY

HECK, AT THIS POINT IT'S BARELY EVEN NEWS
[ Citations: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6; not to be confused with this or this ]

SEPTEMBER 6th, PART II -- Seven Reader Submissions

PLEASE! COME DOWNTOWN! THERE'S SO MUCH TO SEE AND DO! ...BUT IF YOU STAY
[ No better way to waste time on a holiday than with some fine Reader Submissions: ]
A JUDGE IN BONDAGE PICS

I THOUGHT THEY WERE SUPPOSED TO LOCK OTHER PEOPLE UP

ASSINIBOINE AVENUE BIKE LANE / WELCOME TO THE PARKING LOT!

THE WINNIPEG FREE PRESS / IS NOT ACCEPTING COMMENTS ON THIS STORY

DRUNK, CHASING CHILDREN WITH HACKSAW / NO JAIL TIME

IN THAT PARKING SPACE ONE MINUTE OVER, WE'LL TICKET YOUR ASS

MANITOBA / WHERE CATCH AND RELEASE IS NOT JUST ABOUT FISH ANYMORE

JACK KING / YOU DUN GOOFED
[ Reader Submissions are posted every Monday as selected from the Winnipeg Cat Meme Generator. Happy Labour Day! Now get back to work. ]
SO FAST YOUR HEAD WILL SPIN

SEPTEMBER 5th, 2010

YOUR SISTER ATTACKS YOU WITH A KNIFE / SAFELY DISARM HER, AND THEN STAB HER
[ Citations: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6 ]